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Friday, April 18, 2008

Slaying our Dragon

An ancient legend tells of a lake dwelling, plague-bearing dragon that once envenomed all the countryside. To appease the dragon, the people of the nearby town used to feed it a sheep every day, and when the sheep failed, they fed it their children, chosen by lottery.

It happened that the lot fell on the king's daughter. The king, distraught with grief, told the people they could have all his gold and silver and half of his kingdom if his daughter were spared; the people refused. The daughter was sent out to the lake, decked out as a bride, to be fed to the dragon.

A heroic soldier, Saint George, by chance rode past the lake. The princess, trembling, sought to send him away, but George vowed to remain.

The dragon reared out of the lake while they were conversing. Saint George charged it on horseback with his lance and gave it a grievous wound. Then he called to the princess to throw him her girdle and put it around the dragon's neck. When she did so, the dragon followed the girl like a meek beast on a leash. She and Saint George led the dragon back to the town where it terrified the people at its approach. But Saint George called out to them, saying that if they consented to become Christians and be baptized, he would slay the dragon before them.

The king and the people of the town converted to Christianity, George slew the dragon, and the body was carted out of the city on four ox-carts.

Today the Phoenix Suns will embark on an epic journey to slay the plague-bearing dragons of the NBA and convert the world to a new order where they will be remembered among the greatest teams of all time. However, the first dragon to slay is the oldest and vilest of them all, the San Antonio Spurs.

This is a battle for the ages, one destined to be hoisted to ESPN Classic game status within minutes of the first tip-off. The gallant Suns have confronted this dragon many times before and has been turned away wounded every time. A new nobleman, Steve Kerr, has armed the warriors with a new lance. Saint George's lance was named Ascalon, the Suns' lance is named Shaq.

Armed with their new weapon, the Suns have wounded the Spurs in winning both games. However, all of the townsmen know that the Spurs are quite a different beast come playoff time. San Antonio might have played its best game of the season against Utah on the last game of the season, when the Spurs mauled the Jazz with an offensive explosion in the first half. That might have sent a message to the Suns that the Spurs are in playoff mode.

The Shaq trade was made precisely for this moment. He was bought at a high price to slay the fire-breathing Spurs. One team with a legitimate chance of winning the championship will be going home early. It will truly be a glorious day when I can see the ugly dragon being carted off on those four ox-carts; a cart for every loss.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Illustrated . . .

I saw this one on someone's blog who saw it on a friend's blog who saw it another friend's blog and so and so on. You are suppose to answer the questions and then enter your answer into some kind of photo site like photobucket or flickr. Without further adieu, here are my answers in jpg format.


1. Age on your next birthday?





















2. A place where you would love to travel?
Spain. I will make my pilgrimage to La Mancha once before I die!












3. Favorite place?
It's really a toss up between these two places because some of my favorite memories come with Fish Lake and Red Rock as the backdrop.



























4. Favorite object?
My Dell Inspiron 6400; it's been with me through thick and thin. The battery doesn't last for more than 45 minutes and I've replaced the hard drive once already, but I couldn't live without it.












5. Favorite food?
Bacon and eggs. I love breakfast in general and the occassional "brinner" (breakfast + dinner) is always a bonus.


















6. Favorite animal?
Basset hounds and any other type of dog that has lots of extra skin.




















7. Favorite color?













8. Where you were born?
Southern Nevada Memorial Hospital (present day UMC).














9. Name of a past pet?
My basset hound was named Matilda, we called her Matty.




















10. Your nickname?













11. Your middle name?

















12. The town in which you live?















13. What are you listening to?
I have 5192 songs on my computer, over 1,000 different artists; I put my iTunes on random and this is what came up first.


















14. Your last name?





















15. A bad habit of yours?
Some day I will stop . . . maybe.














16. Your first job?
















17. Your hobby?
The perfect game! Why you ask? It's the perfect blend of skill and luck.












18. Your grandmas' names?



Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Rooting for a bad team to lose

Sometimes I feel ashamed for rooting against the lowly Atlanta Hawks. After all, the Hawks loss to the Pacers last night dropped Atlanta to 36-42 on the season, giving them NINE consecutive losing seasons. That sets a franchise record; the St. Louis Hawks posted losing marks in eight consecutive seasons from 1949-1950 to 1956-1957.

Oh, and there's the little thing where the Hawks own the league's longest playoff drought which happens to equal their record for losing seasons in years. However, I am a Phoenix Suns fanatic, and Atlanta's demise can only be a good thing for the Suns. Let me explain . . .

Way back in 2005, the Suns had just come off an amazing playoff run in the inaugural season of the Nash era. Ironically, part of the reason we lost to the Spurs in the Western Conference finals (apart from the realization that the Spurs are to the Suns as kryptonite is to Superman) is that Joe Johnson got taken down by a Jerry Stackhouse cheap foul that caused a bad fall in the series against the Mavs and thus had a displaced fracture in the bone around his left eye. (I'm just now realizing how unlucky the Suns have been with cheap fouls in the playoffs!!)

Anyway, long story short, Joe Johnson wanted the ball more, he wasn't going to get it with Nash around so the Suns did a sign-and-trade transaction with Atlanta, in exchange for Boris Diaw and two conditional draft picks, on August 19, 2005.

Fast-forward to last year's draft lottery. Atlanta was pegged to get the fourth pick, but the damnable lottery moved them into the third spot thus protecting their conditional status on the pick that was going to go to Phoenix. The Suns could have drafted Nash's future replacement in Mike Conley Jr, or gone to NBA-ready Jeff Green, or gone with energy off the bench in the form of Joakim Noah. Anyway you put it, the Suns got sucker punched again, although the acquisition of Diaw did pay immediate dividends when Amare was out for a season.

This year, however, the Hawks' pick is unconditional. The Hawks started the season playing .500 ball which is good enough for a mid-range playoff spot in the Leastern Conference, but then they began to plummet after the New Year and looked to be down for the count until they finally started to put a few wins together in March.

Which brings us to the final four games of the season. Atlanta is 2 games up on Indiana for the final playoff spot and the right to be creamed in the first round by the mighty Bostonians. If Atlanta goes to the playoffs their pick is yanked out of the lottery and put at the middle of the draft, around pick 15. If Indiana goes, then the pick is back in the lottery and at worst the Suns will get the 12th pick.

Why all the fuss about 3 positions lower in the draft? It's not so much the difference between 12 and 15 but the difference between being in the lottery and not. Last year Portland and Seattle respectively had a 5.3% and 8.8% chance of getting the first pick in the draft and they went 1-2. Boston had a 19.9% chance of getting the top pick and they slipped to 5th! What I'm trying to say is sometimes a team can get lucky.

So, on to looking at the possibility of Phoenix getting lucky. These are the final games for both the Pacers and the Hawks:


Atlanta's Schedule:
4/11 @NY
4/12 BOS
4/15 ORL
4/16 @MIA
Indiana's Schedule:
4/11 @PHI
4/12 CHA
4/14 @WAS
4/16 NY

Looking at the two schedules, it appears that Atlanta can probably win two games one against New York and the other against Miami. However, the last game is the second on a back-to-back game, but then again Miami is playing for the ping-pong balls and is starting D-league guys.

Indiana can easily beat Charlotte and New York but has a couple of tough road games against Philadelphia and Washington. If Atlanta wins two, then Indiana has to win out. Another thing in Indiana's favor is the tie-breaker it owns over Atlanta as a result of their win last night.

I really am sorry for all 39 of the remaining Hawks fans out there, but this is my team's chance to get a little better and have an outside shot at the big names in the draft. Without further adeu, I wish nothing but bad luck upon the Hawks over the last four games, and may the worst team keeping on losing.

By the way, anyone ever pick up on the Atlanta logo Hitler connection? Just thought I'd throw more bad karma out there for the Hawks.




Monday, April 7, 2008

The Association

The greatest sport in the world has less than a few weeks to finish up an incredible season. One fantasy team is going to win, another is going to be fighting for the win until the last day, while in an another my dearest wife put the smack down and ended my post-season prematurely.

After the trade for Shaq, the Suns took awhile to adjust and are just now starting to turn it around. As I was contemplating a follow-up to my initial trade reaction, I came across a draft of a blog entry that I didn't complete back in November. I commented on Kobe and his pessimism at the start of the season and the status of the Heat:
If Kobe Bryant thinks the Lakers' talent is lacking, he should check out what Dwyane Wade gets to go to war with. Outside of Udonis Haslem, the remainder of Miami is comprised of the old (Penny, Shaquille O'Neal, Alonzo Mounring) and the restless (Ricky Davis, Jason Williams, Mark Blount, Dorell Wright). If I'm Wade, I'm demanding Pat Riley trade me to L.A. so I can play with Andrew Bynum and Jordan Farmar.

I suspected Shaq might be nearing the end as I watched the game against the Spurs last week. On one telling play, he turned baseline from his customary left block position and Bruce Bowen was sliding over a hair late for the double team. The old (er, young) Shaq checks Bowen into the third row and rips the rim off. Today's version turns meekly back and throws it out to the perimeter.

By the way, I must confess to a newborn appreciation of Riley for his contemptuous indictment of the Heat following its home loss to the winless Sonics. Only a master motivator can get away unscathed from jumping into the foxhole and fragging his troops.
It's really amazing how the much the league has changed (apart from the Heat really stinking it up) by having so many marquee players trading teams. Kobe's team got manna from heaven in the form a seven-foot Spaniard and the Suns have incredibly kept up the pace with the rest of the league while figuring out an entirely new system. What's even more amazing is Shaq's invigorated play since being acquired by the western gunslingers. He's not exactly checking the Bruce Bowens of the league into the third row but he is managing to rip the rim off (or at least the net) and throw himself into the third row for a lose ball.

It remains to be seen what will happen in the playoffs, but I've seen the Suns be able to do something I always wish we'd be able to do, that is play a slow-down half court offense with the fast pace offense. Few are the teams that can play both methods effectively, the Spurs, and Jazz are the only teams I can think of that are able to do that. Also, the rebounding concerns seem to have been allayed and Grant Hill has been doing a pretty good job at defending the perimeter.

However, by the looks of things we're not going to get home court advantage at any point unless the Lakers crap out the rest of the games. So, we're stuck with anything from the 4-6 seeds and an opponent match-up of San Antonio, L.A., or Utah. Needless to say that first round will be incredibly hard against any of those teams. I still like our chances with the team we have, I just think we need to get more lucky than good to win it all this year.